Monday, December 22, 2014


So after finishing my short film I was inspired to keep the creativity going but also totally drained.

Then a boy came along.

Whenever you meet someone new there is all this pressure to not come off too needy or crazy or mean or easy or like your trying to hard or that you don't care.

It's hard when you over think all of that.

Of course all girls do is talk to each other about every minut detail of every conversation and text until the code is broken and the problem is solved.

Only problem is the code is never really broken and usually we just wind up assuming a bunch of stuff, getting frustrated, or wasting mental energy trying to come off like we're so cool we could barley care.

I'm sticking to my philosophy.

What is it you ask?

Forget about all the "rules" 
Just do what you want and don't second guess yourself

Well I don't want to wait several hours or seven days to text someone back so I appear like I'm busy or I don't care.  Because the truth is, if I want to talk to someone or see them then I'm just going to act that way.  What is the point on trying to be so cooly aloof anyway?

Everything comes out in the wash and later on after the jig is up and I can no longer carry on my charade as super cool girl who barley has time to care, I'm just going to be myself which is fucking awesome and also an attention whore.  Everyone loves attention and affection, maybe I do more than others but I like to just be upfront about it.  So why act like I don't want what I do want and hope that later on ill get it because I was what? patient… um no
I'll just be needy from the get go thank you very much

Also… Im pretty sure that even when I am really busy I will reply to someone I like as soon as possible so obviously I wasn't that busy for 7 days or 7 hours.
Just cause you respond immediately doesn't mean you don't have a life or aren't doing some, it just means your a bad ass multitasked and decided they were worth the time to respond to…


So instead of wasting time acting like I don't want to see this boy I just do, and it's been working out so far.  I try and push all the girly what if's out of my mind and just enjoy whats happening in this moment.

Why waste moments that could be great because your too preoccupied with looking a certain way to some else.  Just do what you want to do.  You want to hang out, then ask.  You want to text back .03 seconds after he texts you, do that shit.

Who cares!?

You'll probably weed out people you aren't compatible with a lot faster this way too.  Although I am notorious for dating people I didn't like romantically with the thought that I could learnt o love them over time… trust me.

It doesn't work that way

unless it has too, like an arranged marriage but usually those are very intertwined with religion and tradition which I won't even get into right now.

Point is

Be yourself

Im crazy, needy, and so awesome all the negatives don't even matter


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